Author: Nam Joon Kim

Singles Match

Randy Savage v. Rusev

Young — What do you you have to say before your match?

Lana — It is Rusev Day in SBW. Every day is Rusev Day.

Rusev — Machka!

 

Singles Match

Dean Ambrose v. the Brooklyn Brawler

Young — Here is your winner, Dean Ambrose.

Ambrose — I take my punishment and fight like a lunatic to win.

Brain — Well, now we got someone who really appeals to the lunatic fringe viewing at home.

 

Singles Match

Dean Ambrose v. the Brooklyn Brawler

Brain — There’s dirty deeds for the win.

Brain — I really thought Brawler would win because who’d lay a finger on him?

Gorilla — You really thought he’s that good?

Brain — No. Look at him. He’s so filthy, I didn’t think anybody would want to touch him.

Singles Match

Dean Ambrose v. the Brooklyn Brawler

Gorilla — Brawler comes on strong. Look at those bombs he is throwing. But Ambrose can take a punch.

Brain — Brawler’s offense is offensive. Ambrose goes crazy. He’s out brawling the Brawler. The ref’s trying hard to get control of this one.

Singles Match

Dean Ambrose v. the Brooklyn Brawler

Renee Young — Sanctioned with a 15 minute time limit, and one fall, Dean Ambrose will face the Brooklyn Brawler.

Brain — What are we doing, putting a guy that looks like he crawled out of a dumpster in the ring?

Gorilla — If you can wrestle, we’ve got a place for you here. We are an equal opportunity–

Brain — And didn’t the other guy just come out of a white van surrounded by orderlies? Who loosened his straight jacket?

Young — What strategy are you going to use against Dean Ambrose?

The Brooklyn Brawler —- I ain’t the flashiest mug around, so I’ll let my work in the ring show off for me.

Young — And what is your response?

Dean Ambrose — I’ve been fighting since I was born and punched my way out of my mother’s womb. Bring it on.

Brain — When he was born, he was so ugly, the doctor tried to shove him back into his mother’s womb.

Gorilla — Will you stop.